Why am I getting seemingly special attention? And how do I take better care of a hypothesized wanderer?

So, I’ll say a little tonight. Rest of story in replies, typing on tablet, insomnia, waiting for diazepam to kick in. Thank you to any that read this. When I’m on a computer, I can share various LOL congruent information that have provided the intellectual information that lead me to be open minded enough to shift my weltanschung from pure materialism to the panpsychism of unity in fractalized intelligent infinity, forgive my negative associations with the term god (despite how infinitely cooler it is once you get to know whatever of it I can comprehend via this myopic chemical vehicle than The Edgeless One would appear based on hierarchical religious distortions and their idiosyncratic taboos, prejudices, and often fear or ostracism or torture based recruitment strategies), as very carefully transmitted by our favorite “ancient alien/Egyptian god”.

I would humbly suggest the 2008 Documentary Capturing the Light, free on prime, for some Confederation action, the 2022 DMT Quest free on yt to possibly elucidate some matters regarding consciousness, and NDEs, in general and in the blind since birth- the majority, while differing based on experiencer distortions, always seem to line up in some way.

I’ll say more about myself and my soulmate who remembers being living golden light and some sort of backwards kneed, six legged, grazer another time on the computer.

But for now let’s just say I was via fear and loneliness lead down a shadowy path for some time. Still while my synthnesia possessing love saw me as cold blue back at my most manipulative, I recently got a green aura! Albeit on psychedelics. But sober it’s turquoise now, so progress!

First ufos proven beyond doubt, some comfort in asking them for help, emotional succor at least. Revelations later. Comments, that I always came across, now don’t, linking to law of one. Every damn website. Click a few times, see religious looking words, run away like a reptilian vampire.

Finally read since it won’t leave me alone. Feelings. Green ray. Odd, sober. No enactogenic amphetamines or psychedelics. Wtf. Overpowering warmth in chest, replacing cold calculation. Replacing the void that desires endless consumption. Read all sessions in order.

4 ho met plus wim hof breathing later on. Partner of free will wants 4 aco dmt. Something compels me to seek the higher densities. Annoying pest trying to block way whispering ridiculousness. Cosmic flea, yes, yes, other self too, but parasite nonetheless. Gnashing teeth fractals, etc. I watch heavy metal music videos on purpose. It did not enjoy me enjoying it and laughing at it. Cyuka Blyat geh weg. I contact light, form conduit.

Partner of unknown density soul attacked. She reacts bad. Flea offers to take her over and remove all pain, reveals itself with cold and looking at cutie wolf Tikaani like snack rather than furry friend. I say this is not a good idea. I place my hand on her heart and visualize twisting violet of good memories and love. I know what flea is inexplicably afraid of, the thing that offers infinite energy and forgiveness. Conduit. Flea retreats. I ponder if this is negative cleverness, I did enjoy winning that “battle “ a bit too much, even if only conduit, it’s fun to scare the thing that thinks itself scary. It said, while in partner, force while positive gives option to vocalize. “Do not command me” I stated I wasn’t afraid of it and it stated emphatically via loved one’s vibration chords that I should be. Maybe alone, but something told me to gather some “friends” or one big friend of which flea is but a small part.

Little blinking lights of many colors, erratically moving on night walks. Calming presence. I ask if they can do anything to help world suffering even though free will obsession on their part. Super sto soulmate says that they say it will be as it will be. Fair enough little lights. I can receive feelings only so far, thick skull.

I later ask on another walk, addressing the confederation that even though it will be as it will be, if they can please at least, if nuclear weapons not disabled, prevent any information from being lost. I say no need for reply. Walk on. Foggy. Then ring of lights appears, golden light has crappy cell phone pic that doesn’t prove much if you weren’t there. And a big ball of light that moves across the sky and vanishes. Neighborhood talk online, the longer lasting lights. Only little friends before. I guess that’s a reply, but I don’t know what it means.

So many feelings, richer life, but unable to turn off empathy. Inconvenient, planet full of suffering. But I hate hierarchy, so guess I have to play nice now. And apparently all my thoughts and actions are uploaded to the cloud for life review. That’ll be embarrassing and a big disappointment. But even repeating third, at least I get to troll god by making it watch everything I’ve masturbated to!

Amo, little lights. Going to pass out now.

Welcome here LSDMTNT,

lol, I remember being there with you on hierarchy when I was younger.

Today I look at the hierarchy on Earth as something quite funny and immature, despite its often tragic consequences. But you might have a look at a very different hierarchy in time/space through the books of Michael Newton, like Journey of Souls, or the following ones. Just if you have time, :wink:

Best wishes for your safe journey

Hiiii LSD,have fun on the forum. Lmao! :stuck_out_tongue:

Yes all events are streamed to the universal cloud.
And it will not be an embarrassment or disappointment when nobody is judging and it’s all being accepted.
“Repeating Third Density” is NOT an embarrassment too, if none is judging (other than your own self).

Quoting Jesus, Judge not and you shall not be judged.
Because the one that will do the ‘judging’ is none other than your own self.

And when you can stop judging/blaming/punishing and start accepting/forgiving, you will graduate to 4th density.

General request for advice, from any entities willing, regarding protecting an actual, hypothesized but nearly certain, wanderer. After reply to friend flofrog. While overly self informed in many fields, I know little of spiritual things besides what I’ve consumed with my electromagnetic skull orbs over the past 6 months since the multiverse finally successfully pestered me into reading the Ra sessions.

Thank you for the book ideas, I’ll look into it. Hierarchy did seem silly when I asked whatever was listening, after attaining vision of the violet circle thing after enough controlled hyperoxygenation and hypoxia to requisition the amount of endogenous dimethyltryptamine I tend to require for satisfying meditation, to please fully open green ray. Strange experience, euphoric but not in a ecstasy type drug way. Deep. Hyper real. Sorrowful. Strange. Mixture of emotions that are strange to have together. Exhilarating. Exhausting. Of course, I cannot demand anything, those beyond the veil give their gifts seemingly to teach what’s possible. I’m 34… was glad to be past homework. Now apparently god, for lack of a less sullied shorthand, is giving me homework. At least it’s not the gottverdammtes quadradic equation!

But it is difficult… for me, to have universal love. Without such help. Conceptually all is one. But when I see the needlessly cruel I still have inclinations to use psychology and knowledge regarding certain things, technology etc. to halt such cruelty. Police, the government, rapists, propagandists, serial killers, the architects of certain global plots to enslave and gather up all the illusionary (albeit still needed to buy food, nicotine, vpns, visits to Cat cafés, spores and poppy seeds to plant in front of police stations, small clown figurines to leave behind every book in the library, remote control vibratory complexes- just the bare essentials, you know) wealth for themselves are difficult for me to feel love for… but I understood it for a bit thanks to some part of the infinite. I really need that 900 years…

But enough about me. I don’t know anything for sure, but I’m pretty sure I’m not a wanderer. I don’t remember anything but this incarnation. But for any reading, I’d love some advice on how to protect mine. Not that I own her, of course, though self sacrificing, she’s sort of terrifying. In an angelic way where the first thing they say is do not fear me with their undulating 9 fiery wings and rotating eye disks.

I’ve never seen a situation, in defense of loved ones, in which she hasn’t been able to terrify the most machismo males away. She made a Belgian malinois, those insane attack dogs, urinate itself and run away whimpering when it tried to attack her cutie wolf, an entity without an aggressive bone in her body, by getting down on all fours and staring at it and shouting something primal. There isn’t a machine she cannot instantly understand how to fix by visualizing some voodoo in her head or a computer she cannot hack. She’s so nice, pathologically honest, and kind. But there’s something burning bright in there, brighter than my species. You can see it in her eyes. Or emanating if I enhance perceptions. Warm, you want to be close to it, but it elicits awe and respect.

She has never read the law of one. But she visualized some purple field when she felt she needed protection as a child. She’s scary smart, but words are not how she operates. She thinks in some rich tapestry of visuals, emotions, smells and feelings that have color, music with touch feelings. She thinks she’s stupid, despite all evidence to the contrary. I have had to teach her to think a little sts when needed to survive this planet. She has an easier time loving everything than herself. I try to get her to love herself, she only can with universal love. But she’s tormented and things try to stop her light.

Every time she meditates deeply or takes a psychedelic she learns some grand new lesson. But first we have to fight off some negative interdimensional crap. I just take psychedelics, feel at peace, see some friends that like to pretend to be stars (always plausible deniability with the confederation…) and watch my little pony friendship is magic. Normal stuff. No demons, unless I take them with her.

Before she ever took psychedelics I asked her what things looked like for her. What she described sounded like something I’d need some heavy drugs for…

She has the worst best luck ever. Anyuerisms that appear out of nowhere, get barely fixed, but there’s helpful vascularity there helping that shouldn’t be there according to the top neurosurgeon in the state. Appendix explodes, caught early due to her weird awareness of things. Most drugs try to kill her. Meanwhile I, in the past, I intentionally try to… rage quit the illusion. Apparently no combination of excessive drugs of a plethora of modes of action do anything permanent or fatal to me. The infinite one is intent I learn my lesson, whatever it is. It’s probably don’t be a manipulative schweinhund so I can make a sonic rainboom with the elements of harmony since I can’t stand inequality or true cruelty so I guess I’d make a poor negative entity. And fathermother only wants the best to serve us fractals their temptations.

Before I read Ra, she wrote a story. She creates worlds and realities randomly in her head, I write by choosing to do so and engineering a story to transmit whatever feelings or messages by picking and choosing, manipulating, tropes consciously. Hers just pop in, fully formed. Anyway it’s about things splitting off from the, her words, edgeless one, to grow and learn and eventually bring said experience back to it. What the christ…

Oh and she always knows when eyes are on her. Turns around immediately. I never do…

And I successfully lie to cops, lawyers, judges, psychologists, ego inflated business men, etc. but she sees right through me. And then immediately forgives me. I mostly lie about the quantity of drugs I took. To her. Hungry, hungry ghosts; it’s like hippos but with withdrawals!

It’s not easy to find community with… orchestrated events (likely Orion inspired, create an elite, kill or enslave… the negative polarity is clever, they hide behind what looks altruistic on the surface and sweater vests, not trying to spread doom, I don’t know how this will play out), so white wizards or shamans likely out of question, and I don’t even have any platonic friends. Irl. Thought it was useless until fairly recently… humanity has disturbed me, in general from a young age. Though I always could get a following with hitlerian speeches. But I’ve never desired power besides besides following my own laws rather than the state’s. Ultimately unfulfilling. But Ra said groups were needed for the good stuff. But I’m no wizard and my polarity is mixed at this timespace juncture. So far as I can ascertain.

So, how do I stop the loyal opposition from disincarnating my angel?

Oh and can I just be her pet like Gandalf the cat and get adopted into her social memory complex? I can lick as well as any cat! And she likes to pet my chest fur!

Indeed. Easier said than done though. Thanks for the response.

Never read the Bible, just Greek and Nordic mythology . But what I’ve assimilated via osmosis is interesting viewed via Ra.

He’s the son of god. But that doesn’t necessarily mean we are not all sons and daughters of the same.

The only way to heaven being through him likely would mean manifesting universal love and forgiveness rather than baptisms, accepting as savior, or eating crackers and wine.

You may find The Best-Kept Secret in History - Brian Muraresku interesting. What early Christianity actually was, it made me soften my prejudice against what historical knowledge and censoring books and the annoying opinions on sex created. Of most sects. I quite like Unitarian Universalism even if it’s deviated from pure strain Jesus. The history of amanita muscaria, the Santa Claus mushroom of Siberian and Sami shamanism is also interesting.

Would you happen to know if anyone has compiled the good quotes from the Bible with an eye to what they’re actually saying in terms of positive polarity? The book is very contradictory, what I know of it. If not, that’s fine.

Vale amicum in nomine patris et filii et spiritus sancti.
Ra pyramidem magnam creavit sed peccata hominum…
Umbrae fugiunt lucem.

I can speak to your question “Would you happen to know if anyone has compiled the good quotes from the Bible with an eye to what they’re actually saying in terms of positive polarity?”.

While it isn’t necessarily a compilation of quotes there is a spiritual YouTuber who originally came from a devout christian background, eventually moving into A Course in Miracles before finally coming across the Ra Material. He speaks a lot on the originally intended teachings of Christ in one of his video series. Here is a link to the first video in the series. He uses a lot of bible quotes and then breaks down their intended meaning using his extensive knowledge of The Ra Material. I Am The Way // Mystical Jesus 01 - YouTube

Actually there is a lot of value packed into all of his videos. The best series he has in my opinion is the Spiritual Intelligence series which attempts to construct a system for measuring your spiritual progression.

Hope this helps :).

Jesus is not a Christian, as religion of Christianity did not exist during his time.

Of course Jesus is the son of god just like you and me are also the sons and daughters of god. And so does the ants, monkeys, tree, mountain, planet earth, the sun etc… There is nothing that is not the sons and daughters of god. Well actually Jesus refer to ‘the creator’ as Abba/Father, but name doesn’t really matter as the creator / the source has many names in many tongue.

All ways lead to the creator, even the STS path lead to the creator.
Jesus claiming as ‘the only way to the father’ only appear in 1 book (John) and it’s highly suspected to be an ‘enhancement’ from our STS brothers / sisters.
Because in ultimate reality, it is only the creator that exist.
And that’s the core message of Ra’s law of one. (and so does the core message of Yogic philosophy, Buddhism, Taoism, Sufism etc…)

“Ultimately everyone will realize that there’s only one person in the room”
– Neale D Walsch, Conversation With God

LSD we support you! Keep sharing your thoughts,youre really smart!

Okay, well, I guess this is my first post here. It is not a self-introduction because I am not a linear thinker, for which I apologize in advance. It is also going to be, to put it mildly, “weird as f-” for what I would normally post on a public forum. However, this is, I suspect, I hope, no “normal” public forum.

You asked a direct question, and, while I cannot answer you directly (I do not know the best way for you to “protect” your Wanderer GF, and I suspect that it is not possible nor necessary, though I can offer suggestions at the end), I can offer some experiences that I hope may be of interest, if not help.

Firstly: Your description of your GF rather fascinates me (I apologize if that is an inaccurate assumption as to your relationship with this entity; you implied, but did not give it a specific name, so I chose a relationship moniker with a nice short acronym). Specifically, you mention something different in her eyes. I believe that there is something to that. It may be an indicator of something. Others have observed this. It may be subtle and may be cliche but it is interesting.

The things that your GF is going through and has gone through sound quite similar to many experiences of my own. “Interdimensional crap” is a good term for it. I’d be interested to compare notes. I have never done psychedelic drugs; this is just stuff that happens to me. The worst was when I was in a state of extreme sleep deprivation, in part brought on by (wait for it) – complications of complications of (repeat intentional) appendicitis. Yes. Brain anyuerism is another malady that is rather close to my heart, though I was not the sufferer. (You would think that after all these years I’d know how to spell it, but apparently not.) However, that same year as the aneurysm (THAT’S how you spell it) affected my life through another, I threw a blood clot to my left lung.

I want to share more, but do not wish to violate the rules of this forum or put anyone in danger due to the misinterpretation of my words, which is a great risk, should I finish my thoughts to completion. I will simply state that attempts to, as you put it, “rage quit the illusion” are, I suspect, a lot more common among those of us of the Seeker of Truth persuasion than the general population. Your experiences, vis a vis their futility, appear to me to be a common refrain. (I, for one, am glad of that. Your thought patterns resonate well with me, and I sense that you have much to offer the greater community of Seekers.)

By contrast, your GF’s experiences – what you term “the worst best luck” – sound, to me, like direct attacks by some malevolent entity that she, using her force of will and access to Source Code, has been able to directly thwart. (My apologies; I know that my terminology is off, and not quite resonant with Ra’s terminologies … I am new to these terms. I believe that what I am referring to as “Source Code” is what Ra refers to as “the use of Intelligent Infinity,” but I would argue semantics.) I could be totally wrong, so please do not take that as gospel. However, I can only state that my personal experiences have been similar. The “appendix thing,” specifically, as well as the “Interdimensional Crap.” The good news there is that the attacks obviously are not successful. She HAS thwarted them.

I do not know how you can protect her as I’m not really sure how to protect against entities of a different vibrational plane and frequency/density. What I think you can probably do best is to support her emotionally, by being kind, and listening. It sounds like you are already doing these things so I think you are doing your best to protect her. I would also caution you as to using substances only with extreme care. They can be gateways. If she is under attack, malevolent forces can get through those gateways.

I hope that this is helpful. I will try to parse through your first post again when it is less late in the day. Your writing style takes some getting used to, and I read it quickly, for which I apologize. I’m going to stop typing now lest I cease to make any sense at all.

Be well.

Thanks for the tip. I believe when trying to find something to show my aforementioned unique romantic partner of 14 years to explain the “hippy crystal talk” I started spouting after reading ra that Aaron’s law of one videos were what I settled on after a search. I’ll check out his other stuff you mentioned, thanks.

Thanks for the welcome. And I am very good at doing stupid things in a smart way, and sometimes smart things in a stupid way.

Thank you for the experiences. I just wish I was in more of a position to engage what she attracts with full knowledge and a view of the chessboard, so to speak. She’s my established mate of 14 years, to give context, btw.

I wish I could stop whatever from bothering her at all… though I suppose their efforts have precipitated revelations she finds useful. For example, she no longer feels ashamed of her panic disorder. She thinks she programmed it preincarnatively so these things wouldn’t be able to control her through fear as nothing they’ve tried compares to what she does to herself.

May I ask if encountering the ra material lead to rapid changes in yourself? I ask because somehow me just sharing the central points via conversation and a few videos has caused her to change dramatically. In the best possible way.

I did not try to get her to adopt the philosophy, I was just sharing. It’s like it acted as a catalyst to cause her to partially remember, mainly feelings, who or whatever she ultimately is besides a part of the infinite as she already felt that. I’m sharing the sessions with her slowly, she’s not a word thinker and she needs me to help attempt to penetrate ra’s rather strange diction, so we call it “alien bible study”, but still it causes me to think something very different is up with her than me. It was still revelational for me, but other than a new road map I change gradually and I’m the one that spent all the time reading and most of the time contemplating!

In regard to drugs being gateways, it would seem some can. I imagine anything as emotionally powerful as direct neurochemical alteration might be similar. Nonetheless she is intent on the help she has gotten from psychedelics, so all I can do is try to use my experience and knowledge to make things as useful and safe as possible. She’s going to do what she’s going to do, just like me in that respect.

You know I never guessed reality was going to turn out to be a sci fi fantasy, I had all my money on cyberpunk or dystopian apocalypse…

My study of Ra and their message is ongoing. You are reading it now. :wink: However, I would cautiously state that it is a very resounding “yes.” Any further insight may prove challenging to convey for a number of reasons … I do not know how much of her true self your partner remembered before reading this material. In my case, the material has proved to be a powerful catalyst for reinforcing that which I had never not known, but which, due to the proclivities of our current incarnation, we must train ourselves to dismiss and/or, at times, to utterly “forget” for awhile. I have also found the philosophies to be profoundly helpful in daily interactions with what Ra refers to as “other-selves.” (Then again, I am in the rather enviable position of not having to interact with many on a day-to-day basis, so perhaps I am positively skewed in this regard.)

I love this. :slight_smile:

I’m pretty sure we ordered “all of the above.” That’s what we seem to be getting, anyway, so I know somebody ordered it … :wink: But yeah, I’m with you; I’m pretty stoked to be playing the sci-fi fantasy track for most of this. It’s pretty awesome. I won’t lie, though; the cyberpunk aesthetic has its appeal at times.

The dystopian apocalypse is pretty disappointing, but then, nobody really wanted it so the ones who committed to it aren’t really putting much effort into it, I don’t think. I mean, they’re pretty much giggling about how goofy it is … “Clown World,” anyone?

LSDMTNT, thank you so much for posting on here – it is truly enjoyable to “meet” you. It is evident to me that your primary focus in this is for the love of your mate, which is utterly unsurprising to me. I’m curious, however, what you feel your cosmic origins might be, since you are making study of it along with her. It so often seems to me that those of us who are draw to this material are not, shall we say, of the native planet upon which it was transcribed and published. It is rather delightful to hear from someone who feels, or at least suspects, that he might actually be one of the “Originals,” as it were …!

I am being presumptuous, though, so I am quite interested to hear your story, if you are comfortable sharing. :slight_smile:

My story is that I have always been a very analytical person. The ra material did have an emotional resonance, but part of that is that it’s the only metaphysics I’ve encountered that can account both for what things like Dorothy Eaddy, British reincarnation of an ancient Egyptian who made finds without prior knowledge of archeology or hieroglyphics that astounded egyptologists, may be spelling her name wrong, she changed it to Om Seti if I recall, what I’ve learned about the ufo phenomenon, science, the better than random results of remote viewing (a Reddit post by someone else entitled The Quantum Leap of Faith or similar in r slash Ufobelievers is good reading), and personal experiences in regard to altered, but hyper real states, and recent psychic entity contacts. It’s the only thing that’s synthesized these things I know of and oneness is intuitive emotionally on my favored entheogens. The intellectual and emotional path that prepared me is a novel though. Also I find it improbable Carla and don would be able to make this up on the spot. And I see no cult motive in terms of the perennial money, women, or power. I have no clue why anyone would freely give away non exclusionary, non dogmatic material that boils down to mutual respect, altruism, love, and humility unless they really were nice people talking to a kind, albeit strange and humorous entity.

Not to say I understand it all: I have no background or interest in tarot cards, for example, so certain sessions offer me more than others. The emotional and visual experiences I’ve had, seen by others sober, indicate there’s either something to this or aliens do exist and have an odd interest in trolling me. But the positive things I’ve felt during positive mental contact are far deeper than any drug or mundane emotion. And I’ve tried most altered states and drugs. Love high enough evolved, so to speak, makes an mdma, opiate, lsd combo seem shallow. That is saying something. I have a long way to go to get more than the gift of a peak of that from whatever higher part of the one seemingly taking pity on me and my love. Long way.

Ah, yes clown world indeed. I find it makes perfect sense that this is a world of children. Not to pretend superiority as I am very immature in my own ways and pride makes no sense to me when any advanced in 3D terms attribute I may possess is just on loan from the infinite one and some advanced souls, according to certain ndes, incarnate mentally and physically disabled to sacrificially serve as effective devices for their parents to further learn unconditional love. It is easier to deal with the seemingly senseless cruelty, hypocracy, greed, willful ignorance, and comical lust by viewing humanity as a comedy rather than a tragedy. For me: but schadenfreude is probably a bias I should move away from even if unfettered empathy for all can hurt a lot.

I’m healthy in body, despite my best self destructive efforts and can’t emotionally imagine being anything but an earthly mammal. I am different in that tribalism, be it race, nation, gender, subculture, religion, etc. means nothing to me. I have my values and I like what I like and don’t what I don’t. I take loved one’s opinions under advisement, but I’m fairly immune to peer pressure as far as humans go. In past times, I’d probably be an idiosyncratic shaman or jester or healer with a lot of strange pets in some forest hut with a female companion or three.

If contracts are signed for major relationships prior to incarceration, I’m not sure exactly why my strongest glue is with a probable alien somewhat I’ll adjusted to a human body. Did always want an alien gf as a kid though… but I assumed she’d come with cat ears or at least Vulcan or elf ears…

I do have some disturbing shadows. My partner slash best friend believes I asked for help and wound up in this strange situation. Ra thought the endeavor was worthwhile even if it only reached one, so perhaps whatever alien other self animates my lover is just nice like that too. And perhaps an ultimately kind but shady character is what she needed to survive earth after veiling.

Not much worthwhile beyond hobbies and art to focus on besides love. I may have been amicable to a kind, but far less prime directive and hedonistic path such as Special Circumstances in the Culture novels by Ian banks. But disregarding love and embracing eternal hell politics isn’t exactly a choice. And I don’t want to be entirely alone, introverted as I may be, and a certainty don’t want to try to be a god. Just being an earthly dictator would be way too stressful.

My selfish motivation is I want out of the sandbox with the cosmic children shoving each other. If that means I have to go full love, then I guess hopefully I’ll manage it someday. Surrendering to the multiverse sounds a lot more relaxing than trying to conquer it via an interminable pecking order. And I’m really lazy.

Thank you for sharing more :slight_smile:

I sort of want to share more also but feel it might all get too personal. I am pleased that you and your GF have each other. I think there is something interesting going on but it’s a little bit too speculative for public forums and moreover – exceedingly difficult to articulate.

Be well.

Words are troublesome communication , even with a talent for them

Describing a whole lot of things with only words and not mutual experience is impossible in a manner that imparts the totality of it. One can read as many accounts of a drug, or a perfect event in some way from the speaker’s perspective, or a fruit never tried. Some understanding mixed likely with misunderstanding will be approached, but true understanding would require a mind meld and even that my hit different as a temporary uniqueness some portion of the way back to unity. Never mind some direct, albeit mental and emotional besides lights in the sky, contacts with very benevolent but too complex and nuanced compared to a human. Poetry could be attempted, descriptive prose can say it’s energizing, profound, cathartic, a meat anology might compare an infant starved for connection being held by its mother for the first time swaddled in preternatural blankets. But Understanding via words or sign language.? No chance,

What is interesting is even “physical” or electromagnetic formations like the smaller ufo lights I talk to, as the feelings they provide feel hopeful and understanding even if their responses are rare (but they are good listeners), are dependent on observation. The strangely protean, multi chromatic “stars”, will “dance” impossible human machine manuevers once they notice sustained focus though letting them know while you appreciate them that you know they are not stars flying around often within or below cloud cover. But here’s the truly strange thing, a companion and you confirm the fake star and lack of mundane hallucination and they will interact in their way with you both,… But the specific dance and colors become unique to each observer.

Not sure if these things are common everywhere, aliens seemingly love monitoring nukes and messing with the military. And an arsenal and air force base slash space base (star link, etc.) is near, in their more common direction.

But the larger ship and magic vanishing giant light ball in clear weather just happening to appear when I yelled a greeting specifically to confederation isoic and small request regarding nuclear war is a coincidence that continues to astound me. If my partner didn’t see it too, I’m not sure I’d totally believe my own eyes.

Sometimes they hint towards a correct line of free will thinking with shoot stars. “Real” meteorites or thought projection pointing towards the fake star I’m currently speaking at. Poor things, they have a presumably serious mission and some human is using them as his diary while walking the dog at night.

My most profound mental visitation seemed to be a hint that the infinite approved of my contemplation of some ra concepts while very meditative and open hearted in state. That while engendering profound faith, in the lol sense not dogmatic religious sense, demanded awe and respect. Not respect out of fear but an irrefutable falling in all encompassing love with it and fascination with the ineffable nuance and complexity of feelings, general dynamism, and tendrils of exquisite, unbound intelligence. And it actually cares about you. That soul massage felt better than anything sexual or of mundane hedonism. And though all encompassing rather than romantic or platonic, the feeling of intimacy is unsurpassed as intimacy without sharing a mind directly is capped. Precious still, but capped. It’s always there, but not in your face and the proof seems in the main subjective. Whatever that is, I can certainly see the mere absence of it as “hell”, as much as I like to complain about 3D clown world. I’m not swearing allegiance to any compassion less wannabe gods, but previously described entity could have me, freely given, anytime. But it wants me to stumble around and make my own smooth brained decisions. It never made me feel unworthy, the opposite, but in comparison the state of what I can guess about my mbs complex makes me judge myself as utterly unworthy of said entity. But I suppose that’s why I’m hanging out at the circus at the kiddy table. I’d do a lot of rituals for just a few more minutes of that connection. My wife feels a bit more metaphysically like that entity than other humans I’ve encountered… which further leads me to suspect our essential natures are from different “grades”.

I respect your free will regarding personal matters, but if you’d ever care to compare notes I’d be happy to provide a confidential email. Guides for darkweb opsec even with clear net used are usually more than sufficient unless you have the entire nsa and dea and fbi on you. The government is never getting certain of my data, but I can’t imagine why they’d care about sto aliens, not like I’m trying to displace their Orion controllers. They can have fun playing sith with klaus Schwab somewhere with fellow enthusiasts and eventually away from me pending ultimate unity. What they’ll have to deal with on that path almost makes me feel sorry for the control freaks. Speaking in 3D terms, they’re really their own worst enemies.

Whatever love and light my imperfect, fractured “crystal” can offer to you and You “others” reading.

The more I read your posts and listening to your way of navigating this experience, the more I think the title of you post is actually your answer. I don’t think you are necessarily getting special attention, although your experience in description is quite different than my own. What if it is in the “special” nature of your attention itself? All of what you describe, and your girlfriend for that matter, seem to see things in a much different way than I’ve read from others. A different reflection of unity and that attention, like:

The nature of your attention seems quite unique and perhaps it allows you to see things which you perceive as “special attention”.

Spiritual Ronin,

I love equally that excerpt you quoted from LSDMTNT.

Much gratitude to you both.

Thank you, wandering one of the spiritual katana and wonder wakizashi and tantric tanto, your comment I think offers something.

All are one, so we’re all special but none more special than another unique quantum consciousness fractal.

Having some facility and previous study before, to protect myself, mainly my feelings and wallet with manipulation and recognition of control…. But not to lie about lying, recognizing manipulation and employing it against bad actors like police, for legal and political heretics and pariahs such as myself, with acumen has been invaluable practically even if perhaps dubious in terms of character development and perhaps spiritually though that was not a dimension of consequence I considered outside of heavy dosages of tryptamine and lysergamide serotonergic psychedelics until quite recently.

It is sad this is so and I believe the machinations of currency, wealth disparity, the IMF, the Fed, etc. to share heavy responsibility in terms of our purported impoverished harvest. Our atomized conditions, albeit with a veil of increased connection but often of a beguiling, draining, depressing, and addictive fool’s gold connection. Excepting information exchange; I have interest in the young as well as other generations and the lack of true emotional depth and dysfunctional, psychologically damaging mating paradigms (tinder and such, focused purely on ego display and shallow, image manipulated techniques far beyond the necessary base level of face and body, taste depending, to entice “red ray”) and well some are perfectly fine, the void of meaning, true connection, belonging, and community bodes Ill given anthropology’s description of the universal, for most personalities, requirements for enduring happiness and opportunity for positive polirizing catalyst via a funhouse of mirrors. And I say that as a drug addict who is still embarrassed admitting to himself he would like to try having platonic friends rather than temporary sts alliances, his soulmate excluded… though it did take me a decade to fully trust even her and she is in inhumanely trustworthy and warm.

Tangent aside, I’m confident in my bs detector. Ndes are some I’ve watched around a thousand, or read but those don’t come with revealing micro expressions and vocal data. It would appear, based on that data, I do believe whatever word you apply to all that is tailors experiences for individual “souls” even using a purely human chemical vehicle dataset. The ones that demonstrate verisimilitude nearly always have a law of one component besides reincarnation, which appears to be a given besides some fishy evangelical accounts I don’t believe. Even if someone is into the standard anthropomorphic god and Jesus thing, “god” will attempt to impart some understanding like it exists everywhere and in everything. Ripples of metaphysical import even if mundane are emphasized; paying for a penniless mothers baby formula or well deserve alcohol. The hated, those viewed as unlovable are peered into and empathy is established.

One successful, accomplished professor was taken to what I imagine was negative time space of a sort. The only spirituality he had known was a Santa Claus esque personal Jesus that would patrol his childhood closet for monsters, an aspect of the creator dressed up as his conception of Jesus saved him. Then immediately started acting like a telepathic alien. The man was disturbed to be nude in thought and thought of something that would presumably offend Jesus. Various female body parts and carnal acts. But Jesus thought that was hilarious that that’s what he thought “damned” him. His success and status were not negative but counted for nothing sto wise, typical holographic tape of lack of compassion and love. Self judging self, exterior divine providing moral support, so to speak.

But the mathematicians see intricate workings. Physicists spiritual galaxies and universes. One lady appeared part of a smc, got blown up and she and her comrades were having great fun deciding the manner of her injuries, blindness could teach one lesson well, and they joked around viewing future probabilities and the apparent hilariousness of said female human bodied entity learning to do art with the non dominant hand. “God” obviously appears to have an infinite sense of humor, it likes playing with itself more than I did at 14 with dsl internet. But always the basics and a focus on learning to love the unlovable and accept the unacceptable. I assume truly negative don’t care enough about others to bother sharing their Ndes, though I remain curious with a few feline lives left.

So perhaps you are right, tribespeople see ayahuascan nature spirits or ancestors. The religious, religious things and angels. My wife and I like science fiction, so I attend my will to that and thus aliens. I enjoy incomprehensible realms of altered states, so living patterns instead of feathered serpents or Isis or the Cave Bear I get. I better get aliens along with my loved ones when I die though! Jesus would just not be me and my wife would likely attack Muhammad on site (she has pointed opinions about Saudi etc Women’s rights)… and I want rave music, lasers, and stdless orgies. I have a,l the time in time space to guilt trip myself with a review of my relatively pathetic, selfish incarnation. My higher self needs to be taught a lesson not to incarnate me with mental illness… I tried to strangle myself in the womb for christs sake! I can do sto if I have a decent basal hedonic tone sans psychoactive and a less psychotic 3D othetself population. Sounds like Ra was on easy mode, as far as veiled states go. I’d like one of the logoi where you can turn pain off, I’d rather have slow progress and purely optional suffering. Going to the same place, I’m fine coming in last if the journey isn’t horrid. I’ll bring back the ways of the Dude without nihilists and invincible rugs and hangoverless White Russians as my unique offering. It wants self knowledge, I never promised particularly heroic self knowledge. Plenty of ambitious sorts, you can have Earth, I’m going to browse for a good while. Apparently no pain of fear out of a chemical body, I’m willing to wait and give up my place in line until somebody notices. If my higher self takes offense, live up to your name… smoke some weed, drink a few bottles of cough syrup, take an oxy and a Valium, repeat for 42 billion earth years.

My wife is definitely different. Admittedly the golden light living around the planet leads me to wonder I I’m dating a “Ra”. She emotionally grasps it all intuitively, even if neither of us really are interested in the tarot type stuff (more aliens and history and tech and less fortune teller stuff please!) and something was not giving up until I read the damn thing. No random dot info links weird places since I relented. Maybe it’s a wife instruction manuel and for some reason my wife seemingly glued to me by fate, same hour, day, month, year of birth, many other strange things happens to be a 3 billion year old ancient alien I have to release from her magic cocoon with psychedelics so we can fight bad alien angels controlled by Bill Gates and Sephiroph and shes super hot and fell into my lap while I eat instant ramen and play video games? Just like an anime like Evangelion. And just like Evangelion, I have no idea what the story actually is, in fact Confusion is the law.

Sorry more weird health things with golden light. Nothing doctors,test, or scans can find. So probably bad aliens, a useful answer when I have no idea what’s going on! Hospital all night needed energy to take care of her and also not be bored. So amphetamine. Apologies for my virulent verbosity and lackadaisical loquaciousness.

Love, light, red phosphorus, ephedrine, ect. To all. Unless you’d rather have a pony, then you can have a pony. It’s a thought form, not very good at those yet, a little ethereal, but hay, you get what I paid for!

I do hope my alien lover remains alive a bit longer or I’m following her to time space like that middle school stalker that won’t stop watching you run with your shirt off in high school and scares away all the females with secondary sexual characteristics because they assume you’re either afraid of little girls or you’re a pedophile- children of both genders are terrifying in groups. What I’m saying is like that 13 year old that tried to molest me, I’m going to molest my wife’s higher density sexy photons on a subway in her smcs version of. Japanese public transportation.

Hopefully she doesn’t die yet though. Please ask that not happen. The self transforming gnome hyperspace architects will know who you’re talking about if you mention “Avey of the sacred circle”.

Thank and good night now morning !