I think I’ll just start typing and the story will come from my soul’s library, through my mind, and with the force of my fingers. The parts of me will collaborate clumsily and delicately to share bits from time that will build some explanation of this life as a human. The best place to begin is on March 8th on some distant decade in Corpus Christi, Texas. I would come into this life with active guides as well as interlopers who would find me and teach me lessons. As a child and teen, I had a few mystical experiences. I’ll save those stories for some other place.
My options after high school were to marry a Baptist preacher or take Government grants/loans for higher education. Neither parent supported my idea about college. I had worked hard for Cs. What they couldn’t have known is that most of my mental activity had been allocated toward working through their chaos, avoiding abuse from my older brother, or managing the chorus of voices in my mind. Relief came when I escaped to college. Even impoverished, I was healthier away from home. I applied my energies to secure the bottom two rungs of Maslow’s Hierarchy, safety and shelter. One morning, a voice arrested many disjointed thoughts. A thousand seemed to be scrambling and screaming, and then I heard something simple. “Husssshhhhh” divided my thoughts. “How can you think with all of this going on?” This question wasn’t punishing but pacifying. I felt empathy from some ethereal observer. I did not know, at the time, that I was actually the observer. During my 50s, I would time trip into that memory and offer words of authority. I had been swapping places with the future my entire life, but thought they were simply visions. About the time I started travelling back in time, my consciousness was sturdy enough to see my participation in the past. During my 40s, I would time trip 100-150 times a day. If you haven’t realized that you time trip, it’s a bit like being in bubble with info from this moment that connects with a bubble from a different moment. The thoughts and emotions can swap. One has an observer consciousness of two different states of consciousness (belonging to two different times and places). I later learned that I also time tripped to past and future lives. I would have to learn how to manage these influences from so many times in order to find peace or at least a means to survive.
My body would vibrate whenever I stood before a particular college professor. Was it fear? Was it excitement? (I couldn’t know then, but he is my boss during my next life. You won’t believe what the Federal narcotics officers have to deal with in 150 years). I’d find this prof each semester and opt for one of his classes. During my junior year, he said, “Anyone who reads Principles of Psychology can make an automatic A.” The author, William James was establishing psychology as a science during the late 19th Century. He had applied medical studies to mental theories, in an effort to correlate the body and mind. I took this challenge even though my reading competencies would not be sufficient to support such a feat. The medical terms were beyond my ability to understand, but an ethereal narrator—as if comfortably situated on my right shoulder—would paraphrase. As I comprehended activities of the human body, I would feel a ping in my head and then have an idea of where ‘this part of the body’ connected to ‘this part of the brain/mind.’ Again. Again. Again. By the end of the semester, I had a map of my mind’s sphere. Fast forward. I was watching my subliminal come in as stimulus and began to re-route them before an idea could come through my body. I set up rituals to reroute my responses to foods that made me sick, dairy and oil. When I saw the McDonald’s billboard (stimulus), I would want golden french fries (response). I wanted to see the billboard without having a desire. With an inspirational thought, I understood that I could spell pause. I began to think pause between any stimulus that produced an undesirable response. After six months of watching thoughts about foods and inserting pauses, I lost 55 pounds. Then, everything changed for good. My father came to town. Bearing a list of my transgressions, he wanted no more to do with me. I set off to insert a pause between every thought of him (stimulus) and every reaction (emotion). Those days were different than the world we know today. A person could disconnect, get lost. I lived in a small college town, before the invention of cell phones and internet. I was alone. Within a year, I had disconnected my past from my present with all things related to food and father. The mind learns how to learn. It began inserting pause between all memories–as these two topics are connected to most memories. I would begin an adult life completely disconnected from any memory that had been created before college.
To understand how these stories about memories is important, I should back up a bit. A week or two after my father came to town, I was driving on a back country road in Texas. The area may or may not be a significant marker in the galaxy. I’ve made this trek a dozen more times since that day in July of 1989 without an interesting event. On that day, I was somewhere outside of Beeville but woke up behind the wheel in Karnes City. The distance between is about 30 miles. My body was vibrating—perhaps convulsing or seizing. I was terrified with the awe as described in the Bible. I heard a voice, “You will write a book that ties Science and Spirit. This war may end.” Sometimes when I’m drifting off to sleep or just waking up, I have a memory of being on a craft. The walls, ceilings, and floor are dark grey. The space is empty and sterile. The airs are cold. I say, “I am scared” to some living entity who breathes and observes from a distance. The airs warm. I wake up.
During the year that I paused between every stimulus and response, I moved out of my past and into my present. The mundane exercises inadvertently created a new future. The voices suggested a plan to label all of the objects and actions in my environment. Each noun had a verb. Labels were easy to grip with my mind. I could manipulate them like a word on a page. After a few weeks, a part of my mind followed labels, and I watched my body perform what had been pre-approved. Life became simple. The labels directed my autopilot around the third dimension, and other areas of consciousness were free swim upstream. I found the backdoor to my mind, crossed over a threshold that was like an inverter, and I journeyed through realms that I named fifth, sixth, lava bubble sea, Consciousness of consciousness, Nothing, and the Absolutes. The energy tranforms between each realm unless it inverts. Between fifth and sixth is a wall with a push force to the left (fifth) and a pull force to the right (sixth). These two realms function like a heart.
Starting life as an adult without memories was HORRIFIC. I cannot describe the pain of having a grown body and not having a collaborating mind. The migraines, the physical pains lasted for a solid three years. I had to learn how to walk without being sick, how to eat, and how to sleep. (With no memory, you have no dreams). I was fit at 120 lbs and had secured a college degree by the grace of many guides, but I was a shell. The wandering began. With $45 and a one-way bus ticket, I moved from Corpus Christi to Austin. I secured a job waiting tables. On the first day after work, I bought a 16-ounce beer from a convenience store and then walked to Goodwill to buy clothes for the next day of work. I learned how to learn, restaurant after restaurant, with dedicated and random guides offering clues from the other dimensions so that I might survive—pushing through the density of the unknown. I used my degree to secure a job at a day care, then at a high-tech company. A career began with in-house teachings of proprietary information. The world was changing, and my guides secured a place for me to begin, again. After twelve years, I could retain information from reading books; and after twenty-one years, my former memory began to integrate with my new one.
I moved a bunch, Texas to Florida to Georgia. I met a girl and fell in love. It was a forbidden love for many reasons. On our first date, she took me to an angel gallery in the hills. A gypsy had nearly a hundred oil paintings of Mother Mary and other celestial beings. The storefront was plain, in a ‘50s style one-story strip, along a county road. The faces in the frames came to life. A dozen or so voices came forth with different frequencies, “Where have you been!” “Where did you go!” I felt a huge blast of love, but I turned and ran. Who were those ethereal entities were talking to? Why had they found a residence in this gallery, in these one-dimensional visages? I think the event was a clue about me being a wanderer. How long have I been missing?
During the past thirty years, I have moved at least 79 times. I stopped counting. The goal seemed to be ‘collect as many kinds of energy as possible.’ As an empath, energy comes at me; as a medium, energy comes out of me; and as an intuit, energy from outside and inside integrates with swirls and spirals that lend to words. Only with the global shut-down, I found peace. The pandemic was life-changing for most of us. Loved ones, friends, co-workers, and even strangers lost lives. Perhaps they were harvested? Perhaps they chose to guide others toward a chosen polarity? I think both reasons and five million more. I wonder what really happened during isolation. Was it a means to shift us into our chosen polarity?
Near the end of isolation, I began writing/channeling a story. Perhaps this story is that story foretold in ’89? It is about Nothing creating Something that creates every thing. Where Nothing and Something find equilibrium, Consciousness finds form. The message is simple—every Something comes from Nothing, one Source, and Consciousness enhances the balance. I’m eager to see how the guides bring the many human collaborators together, and we might share this story with the world.
Also, I found QHHT. This past life regression method offered a more formal way to time trip. I go back and forth for answers. Here is a link to a video of a future life, ~2190 AD: [https://youtu.be/7NG90UCx-Gk?si=Ps1E35COKguCB2kt]
The second video from this session best shows the musings of a wanderer: [https://youtu.be/HDf1uv_p1EY?si=iKS6kwiD_IH07EfC]
Recently, I found Law of One. There are many similarities between the story about Nothing and the world that Ra relays. I am grateful to have found this body of work. When I read the volumes or listen to the audio, I don’t feel insane—and that’s a bit of a miracle—you know?
At 58 years old, I finally know my rhythm. Other rhythms influence me, but I have tools and means to secure peace within my sphere. Sometimes, I am sad that I did not get lost in a human story that was full of ignorance and impetus, but most times I am grateful for the opportunity to ground the many facets of me in this space/time. Peace. Love. Adonai.