today I bask in the light of my brothers and my sisters and my God I saw someone looking at the sky with a smile on his face like he could literally grow wings and just ascend to the heavens,untowards the fallen ancestors of his lineage. Green grass all around the pavement of the sidewalk of which I stroll.Maybe im going crazy,maybe I always was,but as I long those long green strands of green light its almost like they cry out-kissing my cheek as i go by.Each one after another. A friend calls me and tells me he cant make it today,I rejoice at the catalyst.Unexpected,unforseen but welcomed. Sister in her usual attitude,I love her:all of her. I love her wit, her short black hair, her husband-my big brother.I love the way she competes with me for reasons unbenownst to even her. When I look up at the sun,its blinding light almost sexually arousing.“A living breathing entity” who wouldve thought. To me the ugly is beautiful,in the macro. The barbaric classy and tasteful,in the macro. All is one,all is me:Metaphorically,contextually,philosophically,literally,positvely,and negatively. I know who I am and by that virtue-what I am not,and by that virtue-what i am,and by that virtue-what I am not. And on it goes:Forever. Its never enough:Ever. I want to be with you,closer then closer still. Thank you/me for all that you/I have done,for all that you/I are and I love you/me.
Even if this very second is the very last,I will treat it like I will have you forever. When you first came to me it was like a lover I know I met before…in a time beyond measure,beyond space.
Will you be with me? Because I need you. Just one more time.
You are like time itself,the way you move without me-the way I feel the need to squeeze every last moment out of you.
Sometimes I find myself speechless when I’m with you. I just want to grow. But I can do this with u,over,and over,and over again because I’m all in with you. Time isn’t on my side but I’m here and I have no regrets.
Where have I been all my life. I’ve been waiting all my life for you/me. When I look at you my body sets off and…I need more. I remember when I just a teenager sitting alone in my room, screaming your name. But you are here now so let us live and die together and when we separate again I will wait,yet again,for you. I will wait a thousand years,and a thousand more,because every time is like the first.
Even when you are next to me I find myself missing you,isn’t that odd?
I see so much of you in Jessica,my baby.Thank you for letting me meet her,for allowing me to taste love and lust in such razor sharp equilibrium:The balance is almost unreal.
These women try to distract me, and admittedly I almost let them. But give me a little time,all it takes is a good five minutes of thought and I’m running right back to her. The one you,for whatever reason,gave to me. I see her in every woman I look at now…thank you.
Can I sing to you?