Greetings, dears. Today I would like to discuss our emotions.
They are a pretty useful pointer to negative beliefs we all may hold, and I think that by looking at them, we can find out some pretty interesting stuff about the world.
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Chapter I: Love of The Heart, What Do I Do?
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So, I’d like to start this discussion with some really easy beliefs in lack, an easy one might be sadness, where you might perceive a lack of possibility or of things ever working out, and may feel that doing anything is futile. So, in essence, you are living your life guided by a sense of futility. This emotion has been felt a lot by our Generation Z given the interlocking systems and negativity that seem to prevent people from being themselves. And by the way, you don’t want to be like those cocky narcissists, do you?
You should just keep feeling lack. Of course, if you want to change this belief I would recommend just cleaning the room or doing stuff and trying things usually, but it gets a bit trickier when mixed in with other beliefs.
For now, we’ll cover a basic combination, sadness-desire.
Basically, here, perhaps because you want to be positive, you might try to get stuff. Feeling your sadness, and accepting it, is not going to be enough to help you here.
So, what we’re going to do in this situation, where meditation might not help, is there’s a cool Eckhart Tolle practice.
Just listen: So you sit with the feeling for two minutes before getting what you want, e.g food. Then, you try to sit for another two minutes, your ego which says you need the thing can shut up, and you sit, and after four minutes, if you still feel the desire, you can get the thing.
The more experience you have with spirituality, the more you can modify this practice, and the easier it will be, because you will be less attached to the opinions of others.
Oh, and if you want to know how to count, you can just like - tap your finger.
So, desire is actually related to a belief, because whenever you get the thing, after a short pleasure, you will feel once again miserable, like you can’t do anything, if not sadness, it can be related to other things. Quick note, once you clear sadness, here’s a great understanding of it, you might like this affirmation: “I renounce all belief in lack and I affirm that I am infinite abundance in the Universe.”
Back to our other beliefs, like guilt. Let’s look at it, guilt is a belief we might best call as the belief in finite forgiveness. Once you realize God has an infinite supply of forgiveness, you can just be yourself, who needs no forgiving.
The truth is your true Self is already perfect, and all that could need forgiving are your actions, but your actions are infinitely forgiven, and in fact, you can just go beyond them and feel total forgiveness.
Not so easy?
Yes, because there’s a bunch of dynamics related to guilt.
It’s one of the most all-consuming and lying negative emotions. And the way we treat guilty people in our world doesn’t help.
If you have ever gone online in the past 4 years you must’ve heard the word “schizo”.
People basically blame people who feel like being themselves is futile and they are unlovable, often getting stuck on past things, and have them be the bad guys. facepalms
Anyways, let’s ignore humanity’s discordance, so cute girls have been proven to generally help people at this level of consciousness to feel some kind of desire to re-start their life.
To stop holding on to the same past issues, trying to make things right, perhaps by just seeing the world as evil and acting out evil.
I am using the word evil here, evil is a belief. The tricky part is that a lot of these people, when they get out of guilt, start to do something I call guilt-control. Regular guilt does it too, but more disguised.
The truth is this isn’t the real belief in control, this is - I am not sure - but the way it feels is you feel a kind of control that’s of a lower frequency.
Maybe that’s just the interference, anyhow, generally people at this level really like to look good. They try to get love, in this idea that no one will ever love them through flashy gestures. The idea is that they’re bad, and no one will ever listen to them. I want you to pay attention to a few words like “no one” and “will” and “listen”.
Basically, this is the essence of guilt, a feeling of futility around being yourself, fun, and anything real, because it will always be considered bad. In our world we generally associate this feeling with people who have done bad deeds, but that’s not the only way that it can arise, if say, like me, you take on someone’s negative feelings, because you are just so curious and believe in everyone being happy, and you can thus experience this dynamic.
People have this feedback loop between guilt and control, This interplay generally blocks out any happiness.
I first noticed it while helping a poor lady on the street. Oh, and to make our friend, who believes that abundance is ever so scarce more confused, this would be a great time to mention I am 17.
Alright, so, basically, the Universe is infinite, it’s useless to hold on to the past, it doesn’t help you make things right, balance an imaginary budget, because guilt is unintelligent. It’s such an unintelligent emotion you basically won’t be able to think. So have fun! Of course, if you experience it in a meditative style you might do well, but still, please take care. I wouldn’t want you living in a state of total projection and basically no love, which we call “greed”.
And that’s where I was trying to get to, guilt is related to desire, for a lot of people there is this selfishness about doing well, and a further structure intended to achieve things for the self, this pattern may best be described as desire. Desire is responsible for ADHD and autism, by the way. Lower desire for ADHD, it’s more chaotic, autism is higher desire, it’s a bit more organized, and specific, and tends towards control. You LOC people and inner body awareness people should be having a field day.
Alright, so, just go over guilt, it’s stupid, and remember, it’s okay to talk about it, everything is okay to talk about, everything is loved, and nothing can exist without benevolence, although I am not implying that the Universe is evil. As I said, evil is actually just a belief, the Universe has never had.
It’s this stuckness, like, I can’t move again. So you should just have fun.
Apologies if I am not doing perfectly, I am still working on rebuilding certain personalities…
What other stuff is connected to guilt? Well first, let's look at a typical expression of it, I'd like to call it light schizophrenia, it's technically not schizophrenia, but it expressed a lot of these traits of being stuck on the same past issues, and of not moving.
Basically, you are not seeing Reality, and you are stuck in this magical world. In this fear-based magical world. I am using the word “magical” here to refer to what 18th century people would call “magical thinking”. Magic is cool, and miracles are normal. Every moment is a miracle, and can be a miracle.
And let’s not forget the biggest miracle of all, you. I cannot not tell you over and over again that this is so important, your true Self is pure, and it’s just the temporary self which is weird, which isn’t really weird, it’s just some beliefs, so it is pure too. Everything is pure, however you are not seeing it.
You know the quote: “If you could see reality as it actually is, it would make you indescribably happy.”
Some other beliefs include apathy, you should be aware of it already, because guilt, when overcome, might become apathy, so you feel like doing nothing, which is usually when you have to find a better reason to live, like, something more valuable than apathy. That’s our short discussion.
Some other beliefs include sadness, which actually tends to be a positive for guilt, if you can feel sadness it generally means you feel something.
Then there’s fear, because of the incredible sense of isolation at this level, you will likely be living with a total fear. There is also control, we’ve mentioned it, you will try to control Reality 24/7.
One interesting note is that this control can, as guilt is being overcome, become something that tries to act as an anchor, because in trying to control yourself to be good, you are actually keeping the guilt going. When talking about fear, we might make the analogy that fear is like staying just above the line of failure and trying to avoid it, in stead of experiencing the full abundance of the Universe, and not even having to worry about the problem.
In this same manner, this control brings the bad with it, and keeps the problem going. It is not helpful.
Practically speaking you should just have fun. Like, I dunno, look at cute girls, think about the Universe, write books, and stuff.
This will free you from infinite suffering.
Note: Nothing is off the table.
So, let's talk a bit about apathy, it's like you feel nothing, and you feel this sense of hopelessness, kind of like whatever you do it's stupid, but it isn't, the apathy is stupid, but first, let me just give a quick overview. You should just first remember that true love is guiltless, I don't know, read some A Course in Miracles passages about it, about apathy, and just have fun.
Once you are making sure you are not acting out evil, you can go ahead and get a cake or something, or better yet, pancakes.
Lol.
I dunno, just try out stuff. Have fun, and be active, play video games, my favorites for engagement are strategy games for mobile, like Easytech’s, World Conqueror 4 is pretty cool.
Just enjoy games, whatever suits your fancy, I dunno.
Try speaking to people, and don’t get too stuck on it, and one more thing, you might overcome apathy through control, and other beliefs like these, but I want to advise that personal willpower is really limited. You can do everything through personal willpower, but I have found it to sometimes not be what I truly want.
Remember, you can surrender all pains to God, and in fact, with something like guilt, you should always surrender whether stuff goes well to God.
Are you attached to success?
Note, with these emotions, you will find hard to do stuff like study, if you are someone like me, who loves the world, you might freakout, but remember, the blocking of your thought ability is temporary, and anything can be rebuilt.
Furthermore, to combat the guilty belief that you are a waster, let me tell you this, even if you waste everything you have in your life, which I technically did by, in this attempt to test out whether you could help anyone, besides taking on negative energy, praying all my positive energy away, note, it did not work fully.
But yes, so what did we learn, after I recalled it, what we learnt is presence always lives, and you ultimately don’t need the world, but the world is lovely. Not to sound too non-dualistic, but like, nothing is yours, it’s all God’s. I mean this in a sense of a collective you. I don’t mean, “You have nothing, poor people”, no no no, it’s cool to have stuff, but I am saying that it’s really a Universal self’s.
So, the Universe we live in is a Universe of infinite second chances, and what happens once you get that chance is infinite fun and infinite abundance.
Note: Guilt is sometimes called depression.
Now that I have confused half the audience, let us continue to discuss fear. It happens that I get this one very well since when I was little people really liked to bully me, and people had tried to kidnap me, so you may imagine that I lived with a super sense of isolation.
I, in essence, did not want to cause drama, so I didn’t tell anyone. So anyways, let’s explore how I felt through some of the scientific beliefs I held at the time. I believed that you couldn’t prove that anyone else was real. I believed that reptilians were among us, that aliens could kidnap me, that the U.S.A. government has triangular UFOs with super cool propulsion systems from UFOs, that there are haunted forests, and underground alien cities.
The iluminati ran the world, and I alternated between crying about it and thinking that sounded cool to have illuminated people run the planet, and I’d like to join them.
I fantasized about death, I loved the esthetic of death and torture, now let’s continue.
So, I found about this thing called comedy, and anime, and first I actually saw anime characters as other people you could call real.
Next month, I was watching a serious video made by a comedian I loved. He just made me laugh, and while watching his videos, I could just have fun. So, he has put up this video over 2 months before about this Logan Paul situation, where this guy called Logan Paul had recorded in a forest where people killed themselves no New Year’s eve, when people are harshest with themselves, and Noble didn’t blame anyone, he just was kind, super awesome, and it was the first time I heard someone saying things like “love yourself” or “everyone is accepted in my community”.
It was the first time I felt someone was so honest and kind, and it broke a wall, and I started crying and knew for sure that this guy must be real.
From there, it was a question of expanding my bubble, including family, including people at school, step by step, and having to not decide to distrust people more because of people acting mean towards me.
That said, things started going down.
And luckily summer vacation came.
Through the next year, I went through a phase of re-discovery, with a few friends, as in the middle of 5th grade (note, in Romania we have grade 0) the last of these bullies left the school. Let’s give you guys an idea, one of the negative people in our class was expelled between third grade and fourth grade, another left behind a year in fourth grade, and this fifth one left to another country, I think I had really imagined I could be their helpful friend.
I want to say that after I had tried out some things, in 6th grade, I learnt about charisma, and just tried things out, I didn’t know about failure, so I just tried things out, and I learnt to talk with people and be myself, and be loved by everyone. Though people were already friendlier.
Basically, my teacher from 0th grade to 4th grade, our educator, always put mean people sitting next to me as an attempt to make sure they wouldn’t cause the class issues, in part since she had disagreements with my parents.
So anyways, I want to say that 6 months from opening up to someone else being real I had a few friends and things had changed, and I had a new life. A year and 6 months later, I was loved by everyone for being myself. I am just saying.
Generally people are afraid that if you didn’t build up skills early you will have to build them up later, but with later experience I’d tell you that that’s just taking on programming, actually, having nothing is an opportunity to build things yourself.
So, let's talk a bit more about desire, I've never really had issues with it since ever since 2021, when I began first by seeing people get arrested in the name of Science, then in the name of studying and giving things back to others, then in the name of discovering my inner world, studying the world, yes, I have always done a kind of moral purism about any alcohol, smoking, drugs, or any vices.
I will admit that I once bought a tincture for healing from flu with alcohol in it, and I won’t even try to explain the circumstances in which I was hoping to help someone, and get something done, and the situation was really risky, and I felt like it might help, without much cost, if I just once, to make sure I wouldn’t take on negative energy, in a way you are free to ask about, while at school, I took this tincture inside the school bathroom before school.
Alright, so yeah, I don’t think we need addictions, I think people often try to justify it through the fact that we need external healing help, but I think the best healing help is friendship. You know, a dear friend I am aware of used sweets for motivation, and I think that’s just stupid, though healthy sweets can serve as an awakener of fun.
You know, this is the only point I will concede on, healthy sweets are cool if they can remind you of fun, and if you have no other resources, though surely you could get the space aliens to help you, especially now with Trump in office, I am sure the alien purple catgirls can afford a little leeway.
You know, a lot of people see our alien friends as really finite and project their limitations with other people on them, but they’re super cool.
Oh, and let’s quickly describe the belief in desire. It is the belief that something outside of yourself can make you complete.
Control. Don't let me start talking about it. So, guys, we are trying to control to make sure things work out, putting self-expression aside, because it won't work.
Oh yes, managers, businessmanship, controllers, governments. All these awesome people who will gladly convince you that it is fun to kill others, well, except the businessmen, they need to make profit.
The managers who teach that people need to be controlled like little slaves, broken that they are. This is the subtlest belief ever, and it has poisoned leadership on planet Earth for millenia.
This idea that people cannot be trusted, and need to be controlled. That they are problematic, scary, and need to be controlled, or used in this scary world.
Here we get a little insight into control, control likes to make you believe you are having fun doing it. Personal doership is fun, it’s challenging, it’s challenging to push yourself, constantly try to put Reality under your power, try to manipulate it without any self-understanding, and disregard yourself. It can be used to justify any degree of self-abuse.
It’s how the negative generally works, but with control it’s so sneaky, because it loves to convince you it’s fun. It is fun. It is who you are.
And even if it isn’t, anyways, what do you know? Being yourself will never work, you need to control sometimes. You see this in our Education systems and basically any human hierarchy.
There’s always this “People are weak.” Alright? That’s why you should never listen to controllers, or I mean, do what you will, but I think your true self just wants to be happy.
That’s why I advised not worrying about guilt, because even if you allow the total death of the Universe, it’s not like you’ll actually do it. This is a very important point on fear and guilt.
And let’s also focus on control in spirituality. Using this as a gateway to discuss how we do a lot of these beliefs about spiritual concepts. For example, a lot of you guys might feel scared to post something too weird because it will hurt people here, it will slow down the Great Awakening, and thus more children will be enslaved.
As for me, I don’t care if I have to write an incoherent discussion of how the freemasons are gay, it’s cool, I think you should love me even if I am more incoherent, otherwise you don’t truly love me, but that’s just because I am used to the whole world hating me, and I don’t mind it.
Even if you do it, so what, it’s just your negative beliefs, that you haven’t integrated. You may see this “evil” in me, removed from Reality, because, just like I didn’t, you don’t get it.
You don’t need to push yourself, you don’t need to manipulate yourself to be yourself, a lot of people can actually get addicted to meditation and think they can only function with meditation. Lol.
I’ve done it. Given I tried it when I was 14, until I was 16, when I decided to just try to live meditatively 24/7, and make things work without it, I totally get it. Do note I still used it sometimes, but yeah, I just want to say that even without meditation you are perfect.
Often times in spirituality we use these styles of speech that “You have to meditate.”, or so on, in an attempt to save spirituality. That doesn’t help, pushing people to mediate. We need to inspire them with love.
People don’t need to be controlled, the global population is not a bunch of losers, and all they need is your trust.
Everything is perfect, remember?
So, let me make this practical, if meditation is not good, and you need to meditate at least two hours a day, how do you motivate yourself? I think the answer is love, and ultimately, you should just try to do what you will.
Remember, negativity doesn’t need to happen. But I am about to say something weird. Being tortured by demonic entities taught me that we don’t need to fight against negativity, but just need to choose fun.
The Unvierse is epic, we have infinite cuteness in everyone, we have infinite love awaiting in the environment, rather than endless offers of negativity, instead having inspiration of your truest qualities, and we have infinite learning.
Reality has anything you could ever want in it.
Heck, to prove that to you, let me tell you, Reality has world conquest in it too. All you have to do is understand your inner world, and then, all inner worlds work with the same mechanisms of the ego that blocks out love, the true Self.
The way I did this is a bit differently, I was wondering how I can give back to the Internet for a few years, and I came across these three principles that should always be used if you are going to try to heal the world.
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Everything is awesome; (Think how liberty is an inherent quality, what is awesomeness is an inherent quality?)
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Everything is connected to everything else either directly or indirectly; (R., why does this matter? Everything exists in relationship. Everything exists in an environment. If you try out actually considering this principle in your life, which may also be stated that nothing can exist in a vacuum, you will find that the table rests on the floor, the bed rests on the floor, and also, that you have an indirect connection to grandma.)
Let’s continue that parenthesis outside of a parenthesis, this is getting weird. So, you might also find it cool to know that all environments are connected, such that the world can essentially be thought of as one giant environment. You are connected to everything, the world is your environment. Now, let’s make this even cooler, have you guys heard of Quantum interpolation? Any two particles can be in a potential relation of instantaneous influence, but what is instantaneous influence? Usually, for something to move from point A to B instantaneously, it would mean that it did not move at all, because movement takes time. That it is at the same point. Another way to write this is that in Geometry AA is just another way to write A.
If you guys wanted, we could write AAA, AAAA, …, but now, why does this matter? Because the Unviverse is in a state of potential oneness. That happens to match what Ra says quite well.
So, our Science has already proven that the Universe exists in a state of potential oneness.
That might sound a little weird.
Oh, and this is a great time to mention that God can never be taken away from you, just obscured, you know, God is super cool, and you can always rely on him as you would on yourself.
“Love thyne neighbor as thyneself.”
- Everything is possible with the right methods. I am still working to rebuild my personality, so I don’t remember why, I assume it has to do with the fact that everything is, but this principle simplifies to “Everything is possible.” once you really get it. It’s super cool.
If I want to meet my favorite footballer I can just win the make some value so I can get a plane ticket and fly to their country, by, say, winning the History olympics. After flying there, they might be willing to meet you anyhow, but if you want to be sure, you can make more value and find something to justify a first meeting. So you’ve met your favorite footballer.
This is the future of the world. It is not control, being different from influencers, and division, but unity.
I may still not the best machine to repeat this to you, but if you want to see something I’d written in late 2024 to help a friend, or someone I consider friendly, who runs a YouTube channel, who was banned (While everything was falling apart, I had to focus on something positive so I wrote stuff like encyclopedias, and cool stuff for people. This someone is the only cool someone that read something I wrote. But that’s not why I wanted to help, after going around praying for influencers, who use cute girl anime avatars, it was like an insult to all my prayers if I just allowed someone to do that. So I thought, okay, let’s show negativity some love. My aim was to help people, and since this has happened, not negotiate with the negative, but make this their end in Internet force. So I wrote this book, first, to share truth with people. And, the next step would’ve probably been to create an alternative platform.)
Here’s the book: files.catbox.moe/mmmz6y.pdf, fortunately our friend got unbanned and all that happened is I sent these ideas to a few email addresses, and that was that.
So, yes.
Never give up on your friends. This idea isn’t in the book, but I like to call it the Love Grid, it’s not about having to help someone else, it’s more like you can just say “Hey, I want help.”, that’s signing up, and if you are in trouble, people can choose to help you. That’s just Reality.
But, sometimes we need phrasing, I guess, and I seriously thought I had come up with it .
Anyways.
So, I hope you enjoyed this, one more note, pride is pretty easy, just don't need identities, don't need to be seen somehow, I actually have to admit, I don't fully understand pride.
The same can be said of shame, though I’d like to talk about it a bit. Shame is this belief in self-disregard, not caring about yourself. There are some ways this manifests like powerlessness, mental self-annihilation, as we may describe it, I’ll get to it in a second, and self-hatred.
Think Altzheimer’s, schizophrenia. Narcissism often relies either on guilt or shame, by the way. If we are to properly classify narcissism, I would “Narcissism is a heavy belief in guilt or shame, with the belief that one is unloveable, and can thus not even begin to think about self-expression, self-love, opening up to loving others, forgiveness, and happiness.”
In fact, out of loving others comes naturally a desire to forgive oneself, just to prove how self-regulating love is, because you will want to be intelligent so you can help your friends.
All negative beliefs have feedback loops with control, there is shame-control, I call that heavy narcissism, guilt-control, I call that light narcissism, there is apathy-control, we call that neediness, there is sadness-control we call that being mean, or, in extremes, revenge plays that are all about feeling a deep sense of pleasure. There is fear-control, often found in dictatorships, though I’ve never tried it. There is desire-control, which often happens when desire tries to get stuff through control. There is just control, think criminals, and there is something that’s a bit more unusual, when prideful princesses who are never grateful might resort to trying to control things to ensure their safety, if you want an analogy.
So, back to shame, shame is about the feeling that you don’t matter. Like, old people often sit in front of a TV so much they develop this feeling they don’t matter.
Guilt and shame love to rationalize away that they are just statistics and don’t matter, and make the whole world statistics, shame does it even more heavily than most people tend to imagine.
It’s not even conscious, there is no consciousness. Just like with guilt, we do things because we are unconscious, and if you realize that, you don’t need to forgive, forgiveness just happens, with shame, you know how spirituality has this “no self”, I like to call this “No Self”.
Because the Self is so blocked it in essence feels as if it doesn’t exist. That is the worst outcome of negativity. Total Universal death. Now that you’ve seen it, you can accept it, and enjoy this world.
So, shame is this super cool belief that - oh - quick mention - there are many other worst options you can imagine. Another one might be the death of all souls, or, I don’t know, worst thing is kind of based on comparison - so when people feel ashamed, like they don’t need to be seen, in extremes, feeling like you are broken, which is the ultimate form of stagnation, you can never change.
This thing about you that’s broken, it can never change. I find it deeply saddening that the medical system tells people with schizophrenia that schizophrenia is this thing you can never change.
The medical system likes to do that, it likes to put people in these fear states where healing is impossible. I am not saying there aren’t kind people, but from my experience, I only met one in years of people trying to put me on pills, put me in psych wards, or something else for not agreeing with me, not because they’re mean, but because the pressure of our negative friends proved to be a bit too much.
One of the things negativity loves to do is to use relationships, because we have this belief in specialness, quick parenthesis, like love is this thing that’s all about responsibility, or a lot of things. This is where you get the story of the guy who goes to the dark side to help his mother and his mother dies and he becomes super dark, or the story about someone who relies on their wife and their wife dies “because you relied on her”, making someone stop relying on love. This is such a coup d’etat.
To get people in the best place ever to completely disown love.
It’s the ultimate ego checkmate. Maybe they have others, I don’t want to know.
Okay, back to shame, the world is super awesome, and you do have power, and you know you should just give love, and you’ll start feeling more love, and then you can withdraw from the whole dynamic altogether. I once, while praying 24/7 in a psych ward, took on this imbalance of my root chakra so I could have the energy to repel something that would’ve made things really awful. So I essentially bet my existence away.
Because, now, I felt this feeling after I got out of super duper shame, and I prayed to anything in the Universe to help me, because I knew I could not take care of it, and you may call that the day I was saved, 13th of January. I want to say that I would be dead without the Trump inauguration, and a bunch of other things, because our friends wouldn’t have given my awareness time to heal in the past months, and would’ve kept up their attack. I know that sounds weird, but like, the Trump guy people see as a fascist, you can’t complain about him that he’s not honest, and I think what you guys need in the United States of America most of all is honesty, truth, people being themselves, which can bring the nation together much more than forcing everyone to be the same, which the other side would’ve done.
So, anyways, I gave out a lot of love, and had support from the Universe, and giving away love, I was somehow able to stop focusing on this dynamic of reinforcement of shame, and I was able to get out of it. So, like, I am alive.
And I don’t want to know what shame is like, at least more than I experienced, if I ever need help on it, I would like to follow the Napoleon Hill way of asking people for help on stuff you don’t know.
